Why You Keep Ghosting Yourself (and How to Stop Feeling So Poopy All the Time)

Let’s talk about that awkward, uneasy, slightly embarrassing feeling we all try to avoid—discomfort.

You know it. You’ve probably felt it before making a phone call, walking into a singles event, or just showing up for something you said you wanted. Sometimes, you even feel it when you get a reminder on your phone that it’s time for the consultation call you booked… and then you don’t show up.

Yep, it makes me sad when that happens. Not because I’m mad you missed our appointment. But because I think I know why you didn’t come. Deep down, you’re not avoiding me—you’re avoiding that uncomfortable moment of showing up for yourself.

And that breaks my heart a little.

Here’s what I believe is really going on: you’ve learned to make decisions based on one thing—how you think something will make you feel. If you think it will feel good, you do it. If you think it’ll feel bad, you avoid it. Simple, right?

But here’s the catch: not all uncomfortable feelings are bad. In fact, some are absolutely essential if you want to create a life that’s full of joy.

There Are Two Types of Discomfort

Let’s break this down. There’s required discomfort—and optional discomfort.

Required discomfort is the kind that comes from growth. It’s what you feel when you go on a date, attend a new event, or (yes) show up to a coaching call. It’s what happens when you do something new, scary, or challenging. It feels awkward. It might make your heart race. Your brain might even go into fight, flight, or freeze mode. But it’s worth it. Because it’s the bridge to something better.

Then there’s optional discomfort—the kind you create with your thoughts. It’s the shame, the self-judgment, the inner voice that says, “I’m not enough. I shouldn’t even try.” That flavor of discomfort? Completely optional. And totally unhelpful.

Your Brain’s Just Doing Its Job (But You Don’t Have to Listen)

Let me tell you something: your brain isn’t broken. It’s just doing what it was designed to do—protect you. It senses that discomfort is coming and throws up warning signs: “Stay safe!” “Just skip it!” “This will be so awkward—why bother?”

But here's the truth: discomfort isn’t a danger. It’s a signal. And it might just mean you’re on the edge of something beautiful.

You can learn to lean into the right kind of discomfort—the kind that leads to love, joy, and a life that’s no longer stuck on repeat.

You’ve Got to Get Uncomfortable If You Want to Grow

I used to feel uncomfortable all the time. And honestly? I thought that meant I was doing life wrong. But when my own coach asked me what I felt on a daily basis and I said “rushed, uncomfortable, and judgmental,” I realized something powerful:

The right kind of discomfort was the one emotion I actually wanted to feel on purpose.

Why? Because it meant I was growing.

If you want a different life, you’ve got to do things differently. And that means choosing discomfort—on purpose—over staying frozen. That’s what I teach inside my private coaching program. I help women just like you move through the discomfort, not around it.

The Lies You Tell Yourself? Optional. Not Required.

Now, let’s talk about that optional discomfort—the voice in your head that tells you you’re not enough. That you’re too this, not enough that. That you shouldn’t need help, or that if you did, you’d somehow be broken.

That’s a lie. A lie you’ve probably heard for so long, it feels like truth.

But it’s not.

You are not broken. You are not beyond help. And you are worth it.

The discomfort of beating yourself up? You don’t have to do that anymore. Not even for one more day.

Try This Today

Until you and I meet, I want to give you a little practice. Next time you catch a poisonous thought like, “I’m not worth it,” or “I should have figured this out by now,” I want you to pause and say this instead:

“That feels true, but it’s not.
I’m sorry I’ve been believing that.
I do love you.”

Say it out loud. Say it to yourself. Say it like you mean it. Because the way you talk to yourself matters—especially when you’re choosing to get uncomfortable in the name of love, growth, and joy.

Ready to Get Out of “Poopy” and Into Powerful?

You’ve been living with that low-level, poopy feeling for a while now. You tell yourself it’s just how life is, but deep down—you know it’s not how it has to be. You're tired. Tired of feeling stuck, tired of wondering if this is all there is, tired of freezing every time help is offered.

But here's the truth: that discomfort you're avoiding? It’s not a sign to run. It’s a sign you're on the edge of something better.

You don’t have to stay here. You don’t have to keep living the same day over and over, wondering when it will feel different. I can help you create a new path—one with clarity, confidence, and yes… real joy.

📅 Go to sharonlamarcoaching.com/bookasession and claim your complimentary consultation call today. Let’s get you out of poopy and into powerful. Let’s help you stop freezing and start showing up for your own beautiful life.

Because you are worth the time. You are worth the love.
And joy? It's waiting on the other side of uncomfortable.