3 Questions to Ask God When Life Is Uncertain

We all have them…struggles, worries, excuses, wishes and desires.  We have them and we want to know how to either get rid of them – the struggles, worries and excuses – or how to get them – the wishes and desires.

We look for those answers in many places.  We talk with our friends, we search through social media, we Google, Pinterest, pray, read scripture, ask experts for advice.  We do lots of looking, searching for answers.

If you are anything like me, you want the answer AND you want it now!

It is understandable that you want to know now.  Not knowing is unsettling.  Uncomfortable.  Vulnerable.  None of which feels very good.  So, let’s not feel them – let’s get our answers!

But that isn’t the way of it.  More often than not, we have to wait for the answer.  And, when it comes it may be only part of the answer.  Just a glimmer or drip of what we want to know.  We read in scripture – the Lord has made it clear that answers are given line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little (Isaiah 28:10, D&C 98:12, 2 Nephi 28:30).

WHAT IF

Let’s go into the land of “what if” for a moment.  What if there were such a thing as God Google.  You could go to your computer or on your phone and type into the God Google any question you had and immediately you would receive an answer.  An answer you could trust.  An answer that was the whole answer.

What would you want to ask God? 

“Am I doing it right?”

Is that one of your questions?  Are you wondering if you are doing life, right?  Are you where you are supposed to be?  Maybe you wonder if there is something you are missing out on.  Are you trying hard enough?  Doing enough?  Doing something too much and something else not enough? 

“What is the timing?”  Is that your question?  When will what I want become my reality?  When will I get married?  When will this marriage finally end?  When will the pain end?  How long will this struggle last? 

Or, “Do you love me?”  Maybe that is your question.  You God Google in hopes of hearing him say “Yes, I do love you”.  You ask because you are not sure.  You know you are his daughter but still wonder if he loves you.  Maybe you have heard the answer “yes, I do love you” before but have forgotten or it is becoming cloudy for some reason.  So, you ask again.

Maybe, it is all three.  You want to hear from God that you are doing life right, that come to find out, His timing is in sink with your timing and yes! He loves you.

Question #1. Does God love you?

Yes, He does.  What prompts you to question whether or not God loves you? 

It is interesting to think about it.  Why are you wondering?  I don’t know that answer for you but I know for myself that the times I have wondered if God loves me has been due to one of two things.

1.     I have done something that has distanced me from Him.  I have those times – we all do – when you made mistakes, you did things that were not in alignment with who you are as a daughter of God, you felt guilt and even shame.   You moved.  God did not.  You moved away from him.  He never moved. 

It is interesting also that when I have distanced myself from Him that the adversary is right there eager to jump in and fill in that distance with lies.  Lies about how you are not good enough, you blew it, its too late now, you always mess up so why even keep trying. 

The remedy to guilt is repentance – change, evolving, moving back to God.  The remedy for shame is similar – it too involves movement – movement back to God.  Movement back to the truth of who you are – a daughter of God.  A loved daughter of God.  It is calling out the liar – and instead remembering.  Remembering the truth of who you really are…a princess in God’s kingdom.

2.     I find the other times I wonder about God’s love for me is when I am waiting.  Waiting for something to start or something to end.  I remember the waiting in being single.  I kept waiting and waiting for God to grant me the righteous desire of my heart – to be a wife and mother.  In those times it was easy for me to come up with the idea that He must not love me otherwise he would give me a husband.  Funny how our brains work.  We take two and two and come up with seven. 

I did the same math when I was waiting for something to end.  Once while working out, I displaced a couple of ribs.  If you have injured a rib, you know my pain.  Dangarooski!  Painful.  Pain, constant pain is hard. It puts everything in to question for me.  Will I ever feel better?  Will this go away?  When will this end?  How much longer?  In those times, if they go on long enough, I can again do the crazy math and come up with a doubt – maybe God doesn’t love me, is mad at me, is punishing me, has forgotten me.   I take two plus two and make it seven.

How about you?  Does either of those ever happen for you. 

Either way, let’s not add struggle to the struggle by judging ourselves on top of our wondering and questioning.  Instead, just slow down.  Be still.  Take some time to quiet your mind, letting go of the self-judgement and open up your heart and mind to the possibility and truth that God does in fact love you.  He always has.  He always will.  There is nothing that you have done, can or will do that will put you outside the reach of his love for you.  Two things can be true at the same time.  You are in the waiting AND God loves you.  It is not one or the other.

If you want to know for yourself that He loves you.  Look around for the evidence.  And ask him.  Ask him with a desire to know.  He will answer.  And His answer is Yes, I love you.

Question #2.  Are you doing it right?

I would submit that you are doing it right.  How do you know that you are where you are supposed to be?  Because that is where you are.  I am not saying that where you are right now in your life was pre-destined, that you had no agency or say in the matter.  What I am saying is that you are doing exactly what you are supposed to be doing.  You are making your best decision with the knowledge that you have right now.  And then tomorrow you will do it again.  You are learning, as we talked about earlier, line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little. 

It is interesting that when you are in some kind of difficulty, you often say “I guess there is something I am supposed to learn from this.”  I think that is true.  But I would add that you learn something – you see the lesson – and then you take that lesson and become a new version of you because of the lesson.  You continue to evolve, develop and grow becoming one step, one line, a little here and a little there closer and closer to your divine potential. 

I submit to you that as long as you are learning, adjusting, changing and evolving you are doing it right. 

If you want to know if God thinks you are doing it right.  I would suggest talking with him about it.  Tell him what you think about how you are doing and then stop talking and listen.  Tell him all about what you have tried, what failed, where you succeed and you are still trying.  Tell him everything and then stop talking and listen.  Ask him to help you see what he sees in you and what you are doing.  Stop and listen.  He will answer.  Quietly and in an unexpected way.  He will answer as you keep moving.

Question #3.  What is the timing?

Perhaps your flavor of this question is, what does the future look like for me.  Will my future hold the things I want. 

Years ago, I was on a bike tour in Vermont with a friend.  We had planned and trained for the trip and felt confident that we were going to have a great time.  We flew to Burlington VT, rented a car and drove a couple of hours to the inn that was to be our home base during our tour.  Each day we would choose from a number of options as to how long our ride would be that day and what the hi-lites would be.  One option was usually pretty long – 60 or so miles, another medium and one short.  One day we chose the long ride.  It was a hot, humid day.  The humidity really zapped our strength.  We were from NV hot and dry.  VT was hot and humid.  At any rate it was a long, difficult day sometimes pushing our bikes rather than riding our bikes – but we made it back to the inn. 

That night at dinner I asked one of the tour guides what the medium ride would be like the next day.  I wanted to know how hilly it was, how hard it was.  I wanted to know what to expect.  I’ll always remember his response…he simply asked me a question “If you could know what the rest of your life would be like would you want to know?”  I replied.  “No, I just want to know about tomorrow.” 

We want to know what is coming and when it is coming. 

As humans we keep trying to shove God into the construct of our measure of time.  Seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years.  Sometimes I want a check list God.  I want a detailed list of all the check marks I need and then the reward.  God doesn’t work that way.  Life doesn’t work that way.  God didn’t design our human experience to work that way.  He designed it to give us a whole experience. One that presents us with opportunities to become.  One where we have agency. 

I think if the tour guide had told me the details of the ride rather than settle my worry it would have increased it.  It may have made me question myself and my capability.  I may have chosen the shorter ride.  How will you come to know what you are capable of if you decide ahead of time that its too long of a wait or too hard?  I think it is in the not knowing that you will discover your true capability and capacity.

Want to know for yourself?  You can simply decide that you are right on time.  You can decide that when what you want shows up it will be right on time.  In the meantime, you keep learning and becoming one line, one precept one little bit at a time.

I encourage all of you to ask questions, wonder about things, talk with someone about your questions, your struggles your worries as well as your dreams and desires.  God wants to hear from you. 

Here is the truth of it…you have always been in a dance with uncertainty.  Life is uncertain.  And because of that dance you are also in a co-created dance with God.  It is the dance of uncertainty that opens up the dance with God.  It is the invitation to dance with Him.